The Case for Euthanasia
by jachilli
Phat props and Ricky Martinz! Yo, bitches, we all dat! We live in suburbs, y’all bamas! All the ladies call me Grand Poobah of Huntington Acres and on the left here is MC Umbro Drawers. On the right, yo, it’s Barry Sanders! Yo, just kiddin’, yo; it’s really my brother Kevin. Ladies! Icy Hot Stuntaz Land is open, so who needs a ticket? Shit, ho’s we be pimpin’ and we’ll come give you a fly ride in the converted Chevy Tahoe that my dad gave us– I mean that we bought with all our cheese from pimpin and slangin’ ‘caine. Or maybe Kevin can come get you on the ATV. Damn, we ballin’. I gots to slap me a trick.
Dear parents of the Icy Hot Stuntaz: Next time please use a condom. Or drink antifreeze.
Dear Snoopy Diggity Dawg: These are the people who buy your albums.
Read about their criminal records, their 10-times platinum album and their various Pep-Boys-kitted shitboxes here. Note also that they’re the “Icy Hot Stuntaz,” but that their extra-pimpin’ Geocities site is …/icyhotstunaz/. Gud werk boyz. Yu are rappers stars! Pimp! Bia bia!
Forgive me for being whaite and uncool, umm… yo. but what the hell are “Stuntaz” and why does this trio of Vanilla Ice wanna-bez feel the need to pollute the internet with this stupidity, umm… yo? (and why am i asking you rhetorical questions?
-Bren aka “Ghost Face Mad Dogg Killa”
Dear Mr. Van Dyk,
I would like to purchase the t-shirts of the Icy Hot Stuntaz, because they are phat (the shirts) and i like tshirts and i like the icee hot stunaz. I think i would like to give my credit card number to them so they can give me a shirt. how safe is my credit card with the icy hot suntaz?
sincerely,
homicidal terrahawk